Deceased Parents

* DECEASED PARENTS *

'For those who have lost one or both parents, then with their passing, remember that you have begun a new phase of birr (dutifulness). Birr after death, which is from the truest and most sincere forms of birr; because birr during their lifetime could be tainted with showing off, being polite (as opposed to sincere) and expecting praise from the parents or others. As for after their death, then only Allah hears and sees you.

After our parents pass, they are more in need of us than ever, even more than when they were alive. What we do for them in this life is for their worldly needs, but after they die and enter their graves, only Allah knows what the state of their graves is. One du'a of rahmah, asking Allah to shower them with His mercy is invaluable. How many a parent may be in the darkness and narrowness of a grave, but Allah, through His grace then through the child's du'a, enlightens and expands  the grave for the mother or the father and makes it a garden from the gardens of Paradise for them. Therefore, never forget your parents, and always ask Allah to shower them with His mercy, enlighten their grave and expand it. Once a parent leaves this world, they are more in need of our birr than ever.

When a nice meal is placed before you (for example), think about the many wonderful meals your mother had prepared for you and how she looked after you all your life. Your heart will surely soften and at that point, let it drive you to offer a similar meal to an orphan, widow, divorced or needy person on behalf of your deceased parent, begging of Allah to reward them for it. Give charity on their behalf, recalling the many favours they did for you. Never forget parents. No matter how harsh they may have been with you, only Allah knows the love they had in their hearts for you. Try to be the best child you can be to them, even after their passing. Remember them in your du'a during sujood, between the athan and the iqamah, in the middle of the night and at all times. Give charity on their behalf privately, wipe away the tears of orphans, widows and divorced (through charity) on behalf of your parents, quench the thirst of the thirsty on their behalf (by having a well dug, for example). Go out of your way to be the best child to your parents'

رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا